What Tiger Woods is to golf, Lance Armstrong is to cycling, which if you’re running a sports mag during Tour de France time makes for a golden opportunity to get the comeback kid on the cover.

After a five-year absence, Armstrong is back, and the mags are falling over each other to tell the inside story as the legend seeks his incroyable eighth championship.

There was no question that Bicycling — the bible of the sport — would put Lance on the cover. The only question was how much play they would give him inside. As far as the magazine is concerned, the Tour de France might as well be the Tour de Lance. His name peppers the issue, with mentions on at least a dozen pages. The cover story, “Red, White and Lance,” argues that his comeback is good for a beaten-down America. At the same time, the piece doesn’t pretend it’s our patriotic duty to support him, nor does it sidestep the controversies and theatrics that seem to follow him.

The latest issue of Men’s Journal also taps into Lance-mania, but the cover story, “Lance Strikes Back,” does a good job of not being sycophantic. It portrays Lance as more than the robot-like winner of seven straight Tour de France championships, and at the same time instills both doubt and hope about his current return. Meanwhile, a story about the late thrill-seeker Shane McConkey’s life and death is worth a read. But skip over the mind, body and health tips, as they are self-explanatory and wind up being nothing more than magazine filler.

Outside‘s main story about Lance is far more ambitious, providing commentary from people in his camp about the various milestones in his career, but the effort falls flat. Feel free to skip it and instead check out the “The Outside Challenge,” a fitness test that is meant to provide critical information about your strengths and weaknesses. Another must-read is the article “Will Work for Baitfish,” which introduces us to the dolphin known as 56. The wild, 40-year-old dolphin is seen up and down the East Coast doing flips for food.

Sports Illustrated‘s annual “Where Are They Now” issue proves to be fairly provocative. While some of these past sports icons featured in the mag are folks we know, there are others for whom we needed a reminder from our grandparents. But once we learned who they were, many of their stories are intriguing and worth reading. Where things come apart for the mag are in stories like “Continental Divide,” which aims to explain why bike racing is more popular in Europe than in the US. Skip it as it will tell you what you already know. Ditto the article on Roger Federer: We don’t need to be reminded of the behind-the-scenes credit he gives to his wife or the obvious rivalry with Rafael Nadal — we’d simply rather watch him play.

We groan at the thought of reading this week’s New Yorker profile on Al Franken, the former comedian who just won a months-long dispute over a senatorial seat in Minnesota. Sorry, but it’s just too soon. After so many months of enduring the battle, we’re tired of hearing about the former “SNL” comedian and his political aspirations. More refreshing is the piece on Joe Arpaio, the new sheriff of Arizona’s Maricopa Country, which includes Phoenix. Arpaio makes his convicts wear pink underwear and takes pride in the fact that it costs more in his prisons to feed the dogs than the detainees. Tough on crime or just plain sadistic? You be the judge.

New York‘s “Cheap Eats” issue couldn’t come at a better time. People want to hang out in the summer months, but no one wants to spend too much in this economy. The best part: a section on where and when to score the cheapest cocktails in the city — all under $8 a pop. Also fun is the piece on the 28-year-old owner of the Observer, Jared Kushner, which explores the aftermath of a family drama that engulfed and imprisoned his father, Charles, several years ago.

Newsweek‘s best story is its piece on Attorney General Eric Holder, who’s seemingly putting his neck on the line by going after the Bush administration’s torture policies despite the fact that his boss, President Barack Obama, has said he doesn’t want to look back and re-examine those policies. Holder’s going there anyway and asserting his powers. He’s also risking angering the very man who appointed him. As the dog days approach, this is a political showdown that bears watching.

Time magazine tackles the question that’s been tackled everywhere by everyone all week long: What’s going to happen to Sarah Palin, the former Vice Presidential candidate who recently announced she’s stepping down as Alaska’s governor? We’re tired of this “debate” because the fact is, no one knows. Not even Palin herself seems to know where she’s going. Let’s move on until something actually happens, shall we? Also, we’re sick of reading the same review on Bruno. It isn’t Borat. Yeah, we get it.