Now that the Oscars are over, all sorts of questions come to the fore. Will “The Hurt Locker” become a smash hit on video, the way “Crash” did? Will it give Matt Damon’s Iraq movie “Green Zone” a box-office bump? What’s next for Oscar winning director Kathryn Bigelow? All of these pale in comparison, though, to this one, which is being asked by every woman in the country: Can Kathryn Bigelow really be 58?

Bigelow, who is reportedly 58 years old, has been making movies since the early 80s. Yet she is as slender and fit as a college athlete. She looks like she could take Matt Damon in a windsprint, if not in pushups. What does she eat? What is her workout routine? What vitamins does she take? America wants to know. Suggestion: Her big followup should be “How I Got to Look This Way.” It’ll be the biggest thing since Jane Fonda’s Workout. She’ll never have to earn another paycheck. The grosses will put “Avatar”‘s to shame.