Gloria Fuentes is no beauty queen.
A snotty pageant coordinator makes that quite clear when the introverted Los Angeles native (Gina Rodriguez) travels from California to Tijuana to see her Mexican bestie, Suzu, compete for the Miss Baja title.
When sarcastically asked if she’s entering, too, Gloria shyly mumbles, “No,” she’s just the help — a makeup artist.
This is the last time you will pity Rodriguez in “Miss Bala” (bala is bullet in Spanish), the American remake of an acclaimed Mexican action-thriller.
Sure, she almost immediately gets caught in drug-cartel crossfire at the local nightclub she and Suzu hit up with shady pageant officials. Suzu goes missing in the melee, and a brutalized Gloria finds herself kidnapped by the sadistic Mexican drug lord, Lino (a menacing, effective Ismael Cruz Cordova), and his pack of tatted-up thugs.
They hold her friend hostage to blackmail Gloria into smuggling laundered cash across the border to San Diego. A violent sequence of events leads her to unhelpful DEA agents who might just view her as disposable bait to lure Lino. It’s impossible to judge the good guys from the bad guys — so she can only count on herself.
As the body count piles up, so do Gloria’s survival instincts. Delivering a nuanced performance, Rodriguez (CW’s “Jane the Virgin”) is riveting to watch, even when her first headlining feature film fails her.
Catherine Hardwicke’s (“Twilight”) direction is competent, but what was born as a banger is slicked up Hollywood-style, pitting it against a pulse-pounding action flick’s deadliest villain: a slow pace.
One improvement over the original: Whereas 2011’s R-rated “Miss Bala” relentlessly victimized its heroine, Rodriguez’s PG-13 Gloria has agency. As the camera closes in on her expressive eyes, you know she’s not going to stop fighting her way out of this border-crime hell.
When Lino finally forces Gloria to go undercover as a Miss Baja contestant to entrap his nemesis, the tension ratchets up. It’s pure pulp, but you can’t help but root for this all-Mexican-American girl to win. You cheer a little when tables turn and revenge seems within reach.
Overall, “Miss Bala” is a misfire — but its leading lady is No. 1 with a bullet. And that’s a beautiful sight to see. Now, can this queen get a movie worthy of her talent?
