I’m happy to report that performance artist extraordinaire Ann Magnuson is leaving her LA abode for a rare run at the Abrons Arts Center on October 14-16. In “Dueling Harps,” she and New York’s own Adam Dugas will act out the great East Coast/West Coast gangsta-rap feud with cabaret stylings. Think Bad Boy vs Death Row but, you, know, with harps.

Actually, rap looks like the one thing that won’t be in the show. “Oh yes, there will be blood,” Magnuson said in an e-mail. “And TWO Bongwater songs. Not to mention some Lee Hazlewood, Mozart, Jefferson Airplane, T. Rex, Kraftwerk, Purcell, the Shaggs, Bauhaus, Donna Summer. And the Smiths, Irving Berlin, Alice Cooper. Where else are ya gonna get those three in one show? This is most definitely the end of an era of a certain kind of performance from me. Call it a Streisand/Cher threat of retirement. Except it’s not a threat. I’m changing directions and this is the last time folks can see a show like this from me.”

Magnuson and Dugas are producing “Dueling Harps” themselves and this is where the audience comes in: You can become a producer and donate money here. For $1,000 (tax-deductible!), you can even get a lap dance from your choice of Magnuson or Dugas. Or go crazy: fork out $2,000 and pick both. You know that’s what a rapper would do.