1 Paula’s unraveling
Compensating for the utter lack of talent on this season’s “American Idol” is Paula Abdul’s increasingly nonsensical, seemingly substance-fueled commentary. Drug induced or chronic pain? Text in your vote!
2 Cult musicians
Wildly underrated singer/songwriter Ed Harcourt is in the middle of a two-week residency at Pianos, while reclusive genius Jon Brion (this generation’s Brain Wilson?) performs at Tonic April 27.
3 That iPod jingle
They did the ridiculously infectious song “Jerk It Out,” heard in those iPod Shuffle ads; this Tuesday, Sweden’s Caesars release their exuberant debut CD, “Paper Tigers.”
4 Mystery Science Theater 2005
Michael Bay may be a total hack, but the trailer for his new movie, “The Island,” so blatantly rips off dubious pop-culture references (Britney’s “Everytime” video; the entire second act of “I, Robot”) that it’s a frontrunner for this summer’s mindless must-see.
5 Hirst’s heir apparent
While spending four months in solitary in Tokyo for punching a cop, David Choe created art with improvised materials, including his own urine; it doesn’t get more aggressively scenestery than that. Check out Choe’s just-opened, Vice-sponsored exhibit at the Powerhouse Gallery.
6 Radiohead’s T
Like chocolate in your peanut butter: the genius South Park/Radiohead T-shirt is now available at http://www.waste.uk.com, with all profits going to charity. So much for Thom Yorke, the humorless misanthrope.
7 New wave face-off
The Cure vs. The Smiths is the first-ever Loser’s Lounge Battle of the Bands (it’s local musicians doing covers), with the victorious canon crowned the superior purveyor of alienation; tickets on sale now at loserslounge.com
8 Wes Anderson’s brother
A sophisticated-yet-childlike work based on a monomaniacal obsession: The illustrated book “Chuck Dugan is AWOL,” a tale about a Naval midshipman, by Eric Chase Anderson – who also shares with director sibling Wes an affinity for suits.
9 Slicing and dicing
Recommended alone for its lush cinematography (for which it earned an Oscar nomination) is the new-to-DVD “House of Flying Daggers,” Zhang Yimou’s poetic ode to popcorn movies.
10 ‘Runway’ hopefuls
The surprisingly addictive “Project Runway,” hosted with Germanic remoteness by Heidi Klum, holds open casting calls for season two, April 25-27, at the Banana Republic in Rockefeller Center.
