WITH the holiday party season in full swing, it’s only a matter of time before something very embarrassing happens to you in front of your friends – if it hasn’t already.

Whether it’s forgetting your hostess’ name, spilling red wine on a fashionista’s $5,000 Gucci fur or turning up at a party and realizing you don’t know a soul there, the potential of the party season to make you cringe is almost limitless.

Sometimes, of course, disaster can be transformed into triumph. Calista Flockhart met Harrison Ford at the Golden Globe Awards in 2002 when she spilled her drink on him. They’ve been together ever since (note well: This works best if it’s the girl doing the spilling. Gentlemen are not advised to deliberately splash their libations over attractive females).

Unfortunately, the Harrison/Calista hook-up is the exception that proves the rule: nobody wants to cause a scene at a sophisticated soiree.

To help you navigate your way through this minefield, we asked some of the city’s most experienced carousers to share their secrets for surviving 10 of the stickiest social situations.

Scenario 1: You can’t remember the name of the person you are talking to.

“Hazard a guess as to the number of syllables in their first name and mumble an indiscernible jumble of sounds of the appropriate length. This is risky, but in a very loud party it can work. Otherwise I just greet the unknown person with “Hey, pal!” or something like that. In my experience “Hey, chief!” is the worst of them, although “Hey, big guy!” and “Hey, you!” come close. This is usually unconvincing, as I am normally a gloomy person.

“I don’t really mind if someone forgets my name, unless it’s my mom. As a matter of fact, I kind of resent it when somebody whose name doesn’t ring a bell knows mine – it’s too much pressure.”

Chris Weitz, executive producer, “American Wedding”

Scenario 2: You are trapped in conversation with somebody boring (also known as the “Ancient Mariner Syndrome”).

“I deal with this situation every night of my life. What you can’t do is say ‘Excuse me, but you’re boring the living daylights out of me.’ And you can’t run to the bathroom (they’ll follow).

“Instead, glance around the room and locate someone you know who can be your savior and then tell the nightmare, ‘I’m terribly sorry, but that’s my loved one and we’re in the middle of a sticky breakup that needs to be ironed out.’

“Then jump on that person, frantically whispering, ‘Save me!’ in their ear. If the nightmare follows you and keeps blabbing, then you can scream, ‘Excuse me, but you’re boring the living daylights out of me!’ ”

Michael Musto, columnist, Village Voice

Scenario 3: The person you are talking to wants to escape (“Reverse Ancient Mariner Syndrome”).

“I cornered Ed Hayes once at one of Candace Bushnell’s parties. I wanted to know if he really was the Tommy Killian character in ‘Bonfire of the Vanities.’ I guess he’s been asked that before. He started backing away – literally, walking backwards – and I pursued him all the way across the room. Eventually I had him pinned against the wall. He had this look of blind panic in his eyes. In the end, he had to ask for my card and only when I’d given it to him could he say, ‘Thanks, Toby. It was great meeting you. See you later.’ ”

Toby Young, author, “How to Lose Friends and Alienate People”

Scenario 4: You are wearing the same outfit as someone else.

“There’s only one option really – go straight up to the other person, buddy up with them, and pretend you planned the whole thing, although, post-Taavo, if you are wearing a T-shirt, you can always nip to the bathroom and turn it inside out.”

Cynthia Rowley, designer

Scenario 5: You run into your ex.

“There are three things to do. Step 1: Avert hostilities by killing him/her with kindness. Say, ‘You look fantastic! You’re boy/girlfriend is so lucky . . . What you don’t have one? I can’t believe it!’ Step 2: If your current special lady/man is also at the party, do whatever it takes to keep them at opposite ends of the room; they’ll either tear each other apart or bond over what a jerk you are. Step 3: Say you were just on your way to the eggnog, then grab your hat and run.”

Rick Marin, author, “Cad: Confessions of a Toxic Bachelor”

Scenario 6: You want to introduce yourself to someone.

“I have to do this literally every night. I have three main ways of introducing myself to people I don’t have a connection to. The easiest is to send over a drink – if I really want to push the boat out I go for a bottle of champagne – and nine times out of 10 the person will come over to thank you and conversation can start that way. If someone is on their own, looking lost, or trying to check their coat, then just offer to help. People really appreciate that. The third way is to just dive in, introduce yourself and say something totally direct like ‘I think we should know each other.’ I did that to the mayor the other day and it worked!

“Of course, nobody wants to be rejected (there’s actually nothing worse), but if you break the ice with a big smile and good energy, that probably won’t happen. Of course, it might – but if you want a social life in this city you have to take the occasional risk. You can’t just expect it to fall into your lap. And it gets easier with practice.”

Amy Sacco, owner of nightclubs Bungalow 8 and Lot 61

Scenario 7: You think your breath smells.

“There’s only one way to tell if your breath smells and that is to ask someone. The best person to ask is your partner, because they can tell you when it smells – in the morning, in the evening or all day. If you don’t have someone like that you can ask, get your dentist or hygienist to give you an unbiased opinion.

“If you have bad breath all day, it could be because of decay or a cavity in the mouth. Just going to your dentist and having a thorough cleaning can make a huge difference, then make sure you get an electric toothbrush, use a really concentrated mouthwash like Peridex, and try to floss regularly.

“At a party, you should avoid foodstuffs with a very strong odor – like garlic or scallions – that have the capacity to keep repeating on you, and use a mouthwash before you go out.

“Bad breath can be terrible for your confidence – people just don’t want to go near you because it can be so intolerable – but for most of us it’s just a question of getting your teeth cleaned professionally on a regular basis and keeping them that way.”

Dr. Larry Rosenthal, dentist to the stars (including Donald Trump, Tommy Hilfiger and Natasha Richardson)

Scenario 8: You are underdressed.

“You never, ever want to be overdressed for anything – if you look like you have tried too hard, that is what people will remember – not that you were pretty, not that you had a great body, not that you were fun.

“I am always underdressed, and usually I will just show up at parties wearing sneakers and a rocker T-shirt. I don’t often wear make-up either.

“My secret is to always have a pair of great earrings in my purse – R.J. Graziano makes great value chandelier earrings – and some Elizabeth Arden lip balm to dab on my lips and cheekbones. Just that can really lift and polish your whole look. Also, I think there is something very cool about pairing sneakers with really chic jewelry. If you are underdressed, people remember you, not your clothes.”

Cayli Cavaco, editor, Teen Vogue

Scenario 9: You are not drinking and everyone else is.

“About 18 months ago I cut down on my drinking considerably. You learn pretty fast that when other people are in their cups and you are not, it’s not very exciting. Drunk people can get pretty aggressive and belligerent. I find that a fixed smile, a quick appreciation of the political savvy of the cretins you’re talking to, astonished laughter at their astounding comic timing and a willingness to be very amused by their jokes make for a good strategy – whether or not those jokes come with punchlines attached.”

Anthony Haden-Guest, cartoonist, writer and bon vivant

Scenario 10: Someone throws up.

“I’ve been at parties where this has happened. Apart from having a guest unwittingly insult the host’s family, a guest getting sick at a party is about as bad it gets. It is terrible for everybody, but at the time it is really more humiliating for the person’s friends than it is for the drunk person. If someone gets sick, you have to physically get them out of the place.

“Of course, it’s better not to let the situation arise in the first place. If someone is in a bad state at a party I will usually say to them, ‘Hey, let’s go to a bar I know which is much more lively.’ Don’t try and talk to them inside the party. Get them outside, then talk to them, then put them in a cab and send them home.”

John Willoughby, executive editor, Gourmet Magazine