For every restaurant gem this year — Portale, Le Jardinier, reborn Pastis, Hutong, Mercado Little Spain and chef Victoria Blamey’s new menu at Gotham Bar & Grill, to name a few — there was a joker. Here, the city’s biggest culinary stinkers of 2019.
Burger bummer: I’ve had better burgers at a food truck than at Chicago transplant Au Cheval, whose fabled burger is so dry and under-flavored that not even two patties on the bun could make up for it.
Foie gras ban: The city’s ban on fattened-up duck and goose liver, to start in 2022, will put thousands of farm workers out of jobs just to punish “rich” New Yorkers. A few force-fed geese and ducks suffer far less than gazillions of chickens, which PETA calls “the most abused animals on the planet” — but the City Council only has it in for “luxury” foods.
RIP, Freds: Technically, the doomed department-store restaurant isn’t dead yet: The owners of the Barneys building say they’ll keep the beautiful people’s canteen going even after the store closes in February. Like, everyone will keep going there, right? For good measure, we hear that it’s going to be moved to the basement.
Minimum wage raise: The hike to $15 an hour from a few bucks less won’t make low-paid employees rich, but it’s already ruining restaurants’ business and customers’ experiences. Owners now give us three octopus tentacles instead of four — and cut workers’ overtime. It also inspires stunts such as at Greenpoint’s Rhodora, where they save on labor by serving canned food.
Insta pressure: On my first and last visit to Red Peony, a Shanghainese place on West 56th Street, managers all but demanded that I post Instagram shots of lame soup dumplings. Why would I do that to my followers?
I’m avo it: Avocado, the fussy fruit, or berry, or whatever it is, once knew its place: in guacamole. Now it’s the unwelcome party-crasher in salads, burgers, pasta, pizza, cakes, pies and even ice cream (we mean you, Morgenstern’s). May this trend soon be toast!
Full of beans: The mammoth Starbucks Roastery in Chelsea lets you spend $52 for a half-pound of Galapagos beans and taste a zillion weird elixirs brewed in scary, sci-fi vessels. Good luck trying to find a nice, normal cup of coffee you can afford.
A raw deal: Sushi in NYC increasingly falls into one of two categories — cheap, color-dyed, mass-produced specimens (thanks, Duane Reade!) and magnificent ones available only on omakase and kaiseki counter menus priced for the 1%. Where’s the maki for the middle class?
Fast-food follies: Overhyped menu stunts flopped three times out of four. Popeyes’ chicken sandwich is great. But By Chloe’s carrot dog, McDonald’s Worldwide Favorites menu and everything at Taco Bell Cantina should die, now.
Ha, HaSalon: This raucous place from Israeli chef Eyal Shani was notorious last summer for its $24 tomato. We don’t know what ripoff they’re pulling now because their website shows no menu. The party scene with tabletop-dancing supposedly resembles those in Tel Aviv, Israel, but I saw nothing like it when I traveled there in September. Chefs I met there said he’s regarded as a joke.
