No one’s getting grounded in this household.
A single mother in South London insists she will never punish or reward her children — and says her parenting strategy has proven successful for her.
Hannah Canavan, 33, is raising her three kids — Esmae, 11, Eira, 9, and Elfie, 7 — using “gentle” parenting techniques.
“I have never punished or rewarded my children, and it really works for me,” she told South West News Service.
Canavan would rather focus on the natural consequences of the bad decisions her brood makes and not place too much pressure on the good ones.
The mom picked up her unique parenting style after working in a student unit for troubled children.
“If you look at the prison system, you can see punishment doesn’t work, as there wouldn’t be second or third-time offenders there if that was the case,” she explained. Canavan now works as a home education coach and home-schools her own offspring.
Hannah Canavan has been using gentle parenting techniques, refusing to ever punish or reward while raising her “lovely and polite” kids.
“People think that my kids must misbehave because I don’t punish them, but that’s not the case at all. Because I don’t shout or take something away from them, they’re not scared of me,” she said.
“They respect me and listen to me because I’ll calmly explain why they shouldn’t do something, and they learn from it.”
The mother of three has never punished her children, no matter how old or how severe their misbehavior has been.
“If they ran out into the road or something like that, my immediate reaction might be to shout ‘no,’ ” she said.
Canavan works to teach her children the natural consequences of their actions rather than punishing or rewarding them. Hannah Canavan / SWNS“But I would then just get them to safety and have a discussion with them about how that is extremely dangerous and show them a video about car crashes, so they can see the severity of it.”
“Nine times out of 10 they then won’t do it again,” Canavan insisted.
She explained that shouting and punishing youngsters can distract them from what they actually did wrong because “they’ll focus on the fact that mum or dad is cross and not on what they actually did.”
Instead, Canavan works to examine the situation and why it happened, but then explains to her children why it’s wrong.
“Kids are kids, and they don’t always behave as you would like them to,” she said.
The mother of three said that people often expect her children to be unruly, but she insists that they are “lovely and polite” because they respect her. Hannah Canavan / SWNS“They might misbehave in a restaurant by banging a spoon on the table and rather than shouting at them, I’ll take it off them and take them outside and calmly explain that we won’t go back until they know they shouldn’t do that.”
The mother claimed that people always expect her children to be awful when they learn she doesn’t punish them but believes her kids “are really lovely and polite.”
She said that her kids listen to her and even go to her when they think they’ve done something wrong because they’re not afraid of her.
“Just the other day Eira came to me as she thought she had broken a table, and she was honest about it,” Canavan said.
“They know that I am reasonable, and they’ll always ask for permission from me.”
While some people believe Canavan is too easy on her children, she also doesn’t reward them for good behavior or accomplishments.
“Of course, if one has done a lovely piece of art or something I’ll praise them and give a genuine reaction,” she said. “But I won’t get them a treat because of it.”
Canavan wants her family to focus on trying their best rather than feeling pressure to succeed. “When they’re older and they start to do exams, we’ll go out as a family to celebrate the effort that went into them rather than the results,” she said.
“I don’t want to take away their instinctive motivation to do something. If they think they’ll get a reward, then they’ll just be doing it for that.”
Elfie, 7, and her siblings have never been punished or rewarded for their behavior. Hannah Canavan / SWNSThe single mother believes that refusing to punish or reward her children has kept their tight-knit family close.
“I feel very lucky,” she said.
“Of course, it’s not perfect, and we all have off days, but we’re a close family and the girls respect me, but are also not scared of me.”
Canavan knows that others are expecting her parenting style to fail or for her to give up, but she plans to stick to it.
“I’ll never punish them,” she said.




