Ron Howard teaches directing. David Mamet screenwriting. Mariah Carey songwriting. Shove those MasterClasses. Comes now a MistressClass. Subject? Sex and Communication. Teacherette, Emily Morse. She’s a younger Dr. Ruth without the accent.

Emily: “We must get rid of the shame we have about sex. Doing It should be like just talking about the weather. Not hot steamy or even cold. The physical vocabulary should be ‘Overcast . . . possibly a chance of orgasm.’ ”

Doctor of Human Sexuality, her podcast is called “Sex With Emily.”

She says: “Pleasure is our birthright.” (Kindergarten teachers will be happy to hear this.) “We all deserve pleasure. And I guarantee your neighbor is freakier than you think they are.” (High school principals will be even happier to hear this.)

P.S. She says with lube we are 80 percent more likely to achieve the pinnacle. And how to achieve such Gratification of Eden if you have no partner? This — I think might be Lesson Two.

Today everyone’s looking for something. If not sex, then faith. “American Underdog” is the inspirational true story of a grocer turned Super Bowl quarterback. Stars are Zachary Levi, Anna Paquin, Dennis Quaid.

Quaid: “It’s the inspiring underdog story about second and third chances in life. Never giving up. Having faith and believing in yourself. Here’s a guy who three weeks before was stocking grocery shelves for a living. He then goes in and they won the Super Bowl that year.”

Kurt Warner is a two-time NFL MVP Super Champ Hall of Fame Quarterback. And he did it without Emily.

Lionsgate kicked this into theaters Christmas Day — still screening now.

Restaurants, travel, construction, dressmaking, food-buying, trucking and etceteras may sputter but filmmaking grinds on.

F. Murray Abraham: “I’m heading for Sicily. HBO series called ‘White Lotus.’ It’s sexy. Really hot. It’s great. But whatever show I’m in at that moment is the one I always think is great.”

An Oscar for “Amadeus,” Golden Globe, Obie, everything but a fire hydrant’s been engraved for him. Where’s he keep all these awards?

“Outside. In the woods. Animals enjoy them. It’s for the gods to look at.” Pause. “In truth, my dear mother had them on her mantelpiece. Now they’re in my home and my children and grandchild dress them with funny costumes. People who never saw an Oscar ask to touch it, then say, ‘Oh, so heavy.’ Then, turning quiet, they pretend to create an acceptance speech. It’s funny.

“An Oscar’s best thing to happen. Bought me two houses, paid for my children’s health and education. I’m in a beautiful apartment. I like being liked. I’m probably one of the nicest men in show business.”

Rich?

“Comfortable. But I miss the stage. I need Broadway back. Any actor who says they don’t love the stage is lying. I love it even when things go wrong and you screw up so badly you even pee in your pants.”

And the F before his name stands for “nothing. I made it up. It’s just to set off the name and make it more interesting.”

So F whoever doesn’t like F. Murray Abraham.

For ex HRH Prince Andrew’s future endeavors, may he learn that:

Only an upholsterer’s daughter but she knew what to do on a couch . . . Only a senator’s daughter but she knew how to advise and consent . . . Only a hairdresser’s daughter but she knew how to tease a guy . . . Only a miser’s daughter but everyone got their share . . . Only a convict’s daughter but she was never caught.

And not only in New York, kids, not only in New York.