Talk about being full of yourself: A new study suggests that lame-duck lovers choose to live unhappily ever after because they think their partners just couldn’t survive without them.

The results, to be published in November’s Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, are being hyped as surprising, offering “first evidence” of selfless caretaking.

Couples research typically explores self-interested reasons people stay together. This time around, psychologists aimed to investigate “pro-social” motivations but ended up with equally it’s-all-about-me data.

“When people perceived that the partner was highly committed to the relationship, they were less likely to initiate a breakup,” says lead researcher Samantha Joel, Ph.D., an assistant professor at the University of Utah. “This is true even for people who weren’t really committed to the relationship themselves or who were personally unsatisfied with the relationship.”

Of 1,348 volunteers tracked over a 10-week period, 500 reported wanting out of a dead-end coupling. In an additional two-month study, the latter group seemed to believe they were doing their undesired mates a big favor by sticking around.

Subjects framed their discontented commitment as a way to avoid hurting their partners’ feelings, but Joel isn’t buying it. “Who wants a partner who doesn’t really want to be in a relationship?” she says.

Sometimes love really does mean having to say you’re sorry — on the way out.