“If nautical nonsense be something you wish …”

The Santa Barbara County Fire Department’s public information officer quoted the “SpongeBob SquarePants” jingle in a tweet about an absurd incident that transpired Saturday. A pair of students found themselves lost at sea and in need of rescuing after letting their boat — created from 20 Home Depot buckets, duct tape, plywood and two plastic kiddie pools — drift too far into the Pacific Ocean. 

“The two young mariners who fashioned their own watercraft were very fortunate that someone saw them, that they were out at sea and notified authorities, as they were unable to make their way back to shore in their boat made of made of plastic buckets and kiddie pools,” SBFD spokesman Mike Eliason told the San Luis Obispo Tribune. “The tide kept pushing them further and further from shore, approximately 300 yards, before County Fire was summoned.”

The 20-something male college students, whom the Tribune confirmed are not studying engineering, embarked upon the wavy waters off Isla Vista equipped with a single paddle and no wetsuits. Alcohol, Eliason tweeted, was not a factor in the escapade. 

Authorities were alerted at approximately 2 a.m. Saturday that the supremely janky vessel appeared in trouble, and a water rescue team was quickly dispatched. In addition to the fire department, boat owners reportedly also launched two personal watercrafts to try and save the young men. 

Roughly 30 minutes later, the rescue team reached the weary sailors and brought them back to land. 

Meanwhile, earlier this year in Florida, a drunk man successfully commandeered a floating Tiki bar into a harbor. Authorities were also dispatched in this instance, but with the mission of taking him into custody for stealing the vessel, the US Coast Guard announced at the time. 

“Don’t drink and boat!” agents from the Coast Guard tweeted of the event.