It took a global plague so eunuchizing it could only rhyme with “cl**ter” for me to finally understand why the Amish skeeve technology. If you, too, are a born-again Luddite — currently suffering from a nasty ’bout of irony — log on to www.discoverlancasterpa.com, book a room at one of over 25 participating properties in Pennsylvania’s Dutch Country, homebase of our bearded brothers and (sometimes bearded) sisters, and you’ll get half-off a second night through June 11. Already torched your ‘puter? Call (800) PA-DUTCH and mention this “Stay in the Spring” promo.