When Hawaii decided to refer to the island of Hawaii as the Big Island, they did so for a reason, and people who doubt that the Hawaiians know what they’re talking about would do well to check themselves. Seriously. This is one big island. I should know — I just spent nearly three hours driving in pitch black/volcano spew-filled night. (Fun times.)

The day started out more auspiciously, though. In fact, it was all the fun we had that kept us from arriving in Hilo until dark. (I’m staying on the other side of the island, north of Kona.) Here’s a look back at the day that was, beginning with Hapuna Beach State Park (pictured above.) Hotness. No joke — the temperature there was 87 degrees.

From there, it was a short drive along the coast to the town of Hawi, which is like Oahu’s Haleiwa — jungly, historic and colorful, but without the crowds and the surfer scene. Or the traffic. We stopped at Bamboo for lunch.

This was lunch. Kalua pig (local pork) and sauteed cabbage with spring onions. Plus, that essential staple of the Hawaiian lunch plate: Rice. (We are not complaining.) A little bit of that other Hawaiian staple, soy sauce, or shoyu, and we are looking at one damn fine meal.

After Hawi, you keep driving and you end up here — the end of the line. The Pololu Valley that the sign speaks of is a treacherous climb down the side of the cliff — where the valley meets the ocean, there’s an awesome black sand beach. Note that the sign says the trail is closed. Nobody listens. Would you?

On the way back, I took some time to explore the village of Kapaau, which is surprisingly sophisticated for being so remote. Kapaau is home to the Kohala Book Shop, one of the best in the state. It’s in a historic building which dates from the late 1800’s, like many in this area, which was big on the sugar back in the day.

Back in Hawi, if you turn on Route 250, you head south through the Kohala Mountains, instead of along the coast. This turned out to be one of the most beautiful drives I’ve ever done. You go up to at least 4,000 feet, but rarely lose sight of the ocean. There’s no way to describe it other than magnificent. Cold, also — the temps plummeted to the low 60’s. The luckiest cattle in the world graze up here — reminding me that we’re in Parker Ranch territory. Parker dominates the town of Waimea-Kamuela down at at the foot of these hills, and again is a very sophisticated town. A very busy one. Coming down off these mountains and walking into a Starbucks just feels weird.

If you keep driving towards Hilo, you end up at the turn for the Waupio Valley, which is at the other side of the cliffs you saw in the picture further up. It’s even more jungly back here. I liked this church, in the middle of nowhere. This valley was famously a hit with Hawaiian royalty back in times past. Today, it’s a hit with visitors, and features a very similar black sand beach down at the bottom, which is accessible by a very treacherous road, if you have 4WD. Which we did not.

See that pickup truck? It has the right idea. I turned left, which meant I had committed to driving the remainder of the island. The road to Hilo features lots of amazing greenery that most of us have never seen, and plenty of waterfalls.

And there we are: Hilo, just before dark. We’ll head back over tomorrow, when we can actually see something. This time, I’ll be sure to set out much earlier — three hours of nighttime driving in Hawaii is not something you do twice. Not in the same week. All things considered, however, this is one of those places you get to and are like, why did it take me so long? I no longer care about how far away it is from New York — totally worth the trip.