As any veteran sports fan can attest, you don’t wait to start your drinking at the game: long lines, 16 bones for over-frothed Miller Lite, 7th-inning last calls, all that crap. Procrastination is the enemy of inebriation, Confucius once told me at Yankee Tavern.

Instead, those in the know have mastered the ancient art of cheaper, much funner pre-game tailgating. Applying that same wisdom to your next hajj to Atlantic City is the ACES #7165 train, which blazes between Penn Station and AC with only one short stop in Newark in about 2.5 hours. On board, they’ve put together something called the Pour Tour 2009 where, every Friday between now and Thanksgiving, they’ll get you tipsy on some special beer or cocktail under some goofy pretext or another, reduced in price some 25 to 40%. 

So, for example, this Friday it’ll be autumnal stouts in a belated celebration of Oktoberfest, code-named “OktoberFast”. Next Friday, it’s “Autumn on the Rocks”, which means signature drinks made of Captain Morgan rum and Parrot Bay. November 13 is “One Sweet Ride” — Ciroc, Crown Royal, Godiva Liqueur, etc. — offering a sugary escape from a long week. Finally, when the promo wraps on Nov. 20, it’s Bloody Marys and Arnold Palmers for “Good Libations”.

You’ll be belligerently swaying and slurring and sexually harassing right into the check-in line of your hotel before you know it — we apologize in advance, Borgata Babes!

The #7165 train leaves Fridays at 8:21 p.m.; fares start at $29; 877-326-7428 (photo by Brigitte Stelzer)