A 14-year-old Chicago kid – decked out in a police uniform – passed himself off as a cop before the long arm of the law caught up with him.

The boy showed up at a precinct house, was teamed with a partner, and worked as a cop for five hours before Chicago’s Finest realized something was amiss because his uniform was missing the CPD’s star-shaped badge.

Authorities’ half-hearted defense was that the kid looked older than his years.

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A little girl in the Jharkhand region of India was married off to a stray puppy – the better to ward off evil spirits in her family, villagers believe.

The pup, done up in traditional garb, including a hooded headdress, can get dumped without a divorce when the girl grows up.

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A British man with a bad back was trapped under his couch for 2 1/2 days, and passed the time by hitting the sauce – an entire bottle of whiskey.

Like some wacky Marx Brothers routine, Joe Galliott of Somerset said he tripped over a phone cord and landed against the couch, which toppled over on him. The phone was out of reach; the bottle wasn’t.

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British air-force pilots may bag that UFO yet.

A former Ministry of Defense official said RAF pilots have fired on UFOs several times over the years but have never actually brought one down.

He said pilots have the OK to shoot but, as in any good Earth-vs.-spaceman movie, their fire has had “little effect.”

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A 111-year-old lizard – well, a tuatara actually – became the proud father of 11 recently.

Henry the reptile, who for years had a tumor on his genitals, turned from aggressive curmudgeon to ladies’ man after an operation. He finally got lucky with a sultry, 80-year-old, loose lizard named Mildred at the Southland Museum and Art Gallery in New Zealand.