A Massachusetts man who walked into a police station asking for help getting out of a pair of handcuffs was arrested after cops realized he had several outstanding warrants.

The man claimed his sister had put the cuffs on him at a child’s birthday party. Barnstable cops removed them, and slipped on another set.

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This puts the loo in lunacy.

The mayor of a Georgia town has gotten into so many screaming fights with a city councilman that he has the chief of police escort him to the bathroom at City Hall.

Snellville Councilman Robert Jenkins says Mayor Jerry Oberholtzer need only “fear me as a political opponent.”

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Hard to know why she was so impressed.

A drifter who claimed to be the drummer for the rock band Foreigner duped a Florida woman into letting him use her Corvette and then promptly crashed it.

Apparently she wasn’t much of a fan of the band. The man claimed he was Cory James, and while Foreigner has had more than a half-dozen drummers over the years, none was named Cory James.

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Quick, to the barkmobile!

Pottsboro, Texas, authorities found a woman living in a station wagon with 22 dogs.

“The car was soaked with urine and covered in feces,” SPCA official Courtney Stevens said.

Police said the woman would not face charges, as she was incoherent. She was turned over to adult protective services.

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That stinks.

A British florist had to give up her career after 14 years when she developed a life-threatening allergy to flowers.

Jan Wass has started a new business specializing in party balloons and fake flowers, but it’s cold comfort. “I still can’t watch the Chelsea Flower Show because it breaks my heart,” she said.