Wonder if the survivalist behind this cache is still waiting for the Apocalypse.

A man with a metal detector in a Lee, Mass., park uncovered a bag of guns buried that appears to have been there for at least 30 years.

It’s unclear if they were ever used in a crime or were just put there to stave off a revolution.

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Coolest . . . present . . . ever.

For just $90, the ice-obsessed can learn how to drive the great Zamboni at a Maryland skating rink.

“People are just fascinated by them,” the head ice-shaving vehicle at the College Park rink said.

The lessons have been flying like hockey pucks.

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Cry us a river, you criminal crumb bum.

A Chicago teen who robbed a Dunkin’ Donuts had a pang of conscience and returned an hour later to give back the $167 he took and ask the clerk for a hug.

Unfortunately, the clerk spoke little English and didn’t understand the apology.

Cops charged the 17-year-old thief with aggravated robbery.

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Oh yeah, sure, taxes!

Swedish officials said they’re launching a months-long crackdown on online Web-cam strippers to identify who isn’t paying their taxes on the fees they charge.

Officials estimate the government is losing $5 million a year in taxes.

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Poor Ninio the elephant — he’s just too fabulous for Poland.

The prissy pachyderm left officials in Poznan outraged when he started exhibiting “gay” behavior.

“We didn’t pay 37 million zlotys [$11 million] for the largest elephant house in Europe to have a gay elephant live there,” steamed parliament member Michal Grzes.

Lukas I. Alpert, Todd Venezia and Post Wire Services