Just don’t do it at the health club.

New TV ads are encouraging Brazilians to save water — by urinating in the shower.

The spot features cartoons of people from all walks of life — a trapeze artist, a basketball player, even an alien — peeing while showering.

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BYOTP!

A luxury resort in San Diego is offering rooms at $19 a night — if you don’t mind sleeping in a tent and supplying your own toilet paper.

The Rancho Bernardo Inn, which boasts three pools, a spa and golf course, typically charges more than $200 a room.

But with business down, guests are being offered a “Survivor Package” that charges them less for each amenity they give up.

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It’s the “kitty porn” defense.

A Florida man accused of downloading 1,000 images of child pornography is blaming his cat, investigators said.

Keith Griffin of Jensen Beach told investigators that his cat jumped on the computer keyboard while he was downloading music.

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No shoes, no service — no exceptions!

Overzealous workers at a Missouri Burger King tried to kick out a shoeless customer — a 6-month-old baby.

The baby’s mother, Jennifer Frederich, had erroneously been told that the barefooted babe violated the health code.