Want to catch a two-bit cellphone thief? There’s an app for that!

David Kahn’s iPhone was stolen in San Francisco, where he was in meetings to show off his company’s new product — a GPS tracking program designed for police and military to follow people and other resources.

If the suspect, arrested in 10 minutes, had looked, he’d have seen himself traveling across a map on the screen.

***

This house was baked!

LA firefighters put out a fire at an empty house in Granada Hills and discovered a sophisticated marijuana-growing operation in the garage.

The fire was sparked by an electrical short in the light system used to grow the plants. Cops are hunting for the farmers.

***

They’re not just tree-huggers in San Francisco.

The city is offering a $2,000 reward for information about vandals who have been sawing trees on public land. Since May, more than 40 trees have been destroyed, mostly in Golden Gate Park.

***

A famed British department store wants to make a few pounds off childhood obesity.

Marks & Spencer is now selling “plus fit” clothes — cut generously at the hip and waist — for big kids as young as 3.

“It is an absolutely tragic illustration of the terrible obesity problem this country faces,” said Tam Fry, of the UK’s National Obesity Forum.

***

An animal-rights activist has caused a stir in Jordan’s capital by covering herself in lettuce in a quirky attempt to persuade carnivores to go vegetarian.

Crowds gathered to gawk at the lettuce lady, but Amman cops were not amused. They arrested Amina Tarek, and a pal from People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, saying they had not obtained permission for yesterday’s protest. David K. Li, Wire Services