Some dogs eat homework — this one has more expensive tastes.

The president of a youth soccer league in Seattle says his pooch ate $300 in cash and $900 in checks.

Bill Fry said he’ll replace the money and encourage parents who gave checks to send replacements.

He found another $300 in cash, which his pup buried in the back yard.

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Speaking of stupid pet tricks . . .

A cat in Port Townsend, Wash., named Osiris, set his owners’ home on fire.

It seems Osiris wasn’t fond of the family’s newest pet, a dog, and took to sleeping out of its reach, on top of a toaster oven.

One night, he used his paw to press the power-on button — and the heat started the blaze.

No people or animals were hurt.

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If the baby was a girl, perhaps he named her Mary Jane.

A man in Uniontown, Pa., waiting for the birth of his first child, lit up a joint — instead of a cigar — at the hospital.

A nurse caught him,, and turned him over to cops.

Authorities declined to release the man’s name, or the gender of his newborn.

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While we’re on the topic of drugs . . .

A man looking to score narcotics in upstate Clarence misdialed, and got the sheriff’s Crime Stoppers number.

The detective who took the call was delighted to set up a meeting.

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It’s the perfect cellphone for people who hate the things.

British officials are working on a new app that will allow users to urinate into their phones and find out within minutes if they have a sexually transmitted disease.

Some $6,500,000 has already been invested in the bizarre project.