This gives new meaning to the word “joystick.’’

A British company, appropriately called Captive Media, has come up with an electronic game for men who get bored staring at the wall while using urinals.

It’s a “hands free’’ video game with monitors mounted over the ceramic bowls. Guys aim at specific points, and an infrared device records where the urine strikes.

The games offered include a skiing challenge and a multiple-choice pub quiz.

***

Students at this school don’t complain about corporal punishment — it’s part of the curriculum.

The International Sex School in Vienna, which charges $2,200 a term, features a co-ed dormitory, where the scholars can do their homework.

***

This lawsuit is nothing short of criminal

A fugitive on the run in Topeka, Kan., burst into a home where a frightened couple fed him and promised him money if he’d go.

The hostages fled when the intruder fell asleep.

He was soon arrested — and filed a “breach of oral contract’’ suit against the residents because they never paid him.

He’s asking for $235,000

***

This sailor is in hot water.

A man who stole a boat in Florida called the Coast Guard for help when it ran out of gas.

About the same time, authorities were alerted about the stolen boat. Cops with handcuffs and Coast Guardsmen with fuel arrived at the same time.

***

A flying squirrel staged a nutty show in a New Jersey hospital’s emergency room.

The animal kept launching itself off an 8-foot high, wall-mounted lamp, makeing safe landings and climbing back up.

Firefighters called to Robert Wood Johnson Hospital in Rahway put a blanket over the squirrel and brought him to a wooded area, where he can use trees as launching pads.