The only thing being shot was a movie.

San Francisco cops responding to a report of an armed robbery ordered a man in a ski mask and brandishing a pistol to “Drop that gun!’’

The “gunman’’ shouted back, “It’s a movie.’’

But his performance had been so convincing, the cops tackled him to the ground.

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Curtis Kipple, 11, of upstate Brockport, wrote a letter and put it in a bottle, which was dropped into the Atlantic in March.

It took nine months for it to drift 2,600 miles to the Azore Islands off Portugal.

He got a reply from the woman who found it in a lot less time — she sent him an e-mail.

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A man in Ephrata, Pa., bought some edible mushrooms, chopped them up, put them in small plastic bags and tried to sell them as ’shrooms, or magic mushrooms.

Police busted him in his car, where they found a sample of his merchandise plus a $30 receipt from a customer who thought he’d purchased the illegal psychedelic variety.

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Workers at the agency that promotes tourism to South Australia came up with what they thought was a great idea — sending newspapers and broadcast stations goldfish in bowls emblazoned with the words, “Be the big fish in a small pond.’’

But by the time the fish were delivered, most of them were dead.

“This is about the dumbest p.r. stunt that I have seen in many years, said Aussie publicity guru Chris Rann.

But it got a lot of press.

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The world’s oldest dog has died.

Pusuke, who lived in Japan, was 26 3/4 years old and was listed in the Guinness Book of Records..

He died Monday when his owner returned from doing errands. “I think he waited for me to come home,’’ the heartbroken man said.