With friends like this guy, you don’t need enemies — but you might need insurance.

A Florida man has been charged with grand theft after he was asked to house- sit — then allegedly pawned $10,000 worth of his pal’s possessions.

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This kid’s first words: “Daddy’s guilty.”

A man wanted for violating probation in St. Petersburg, Fla., was caught hiding in an attic after his 2-year-old son told cops where he was.

The boy blurted out his pop’s hiding spot while officers were questioning Mommy — who, of course, was claiming not to know where Daddy was.

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Weird But True doesn’t normally give out fashion advice, but here’s a tip: Don’t wear a “How to Make Crack” jacket to court.

A man made that bold fashion statement in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., when he arrived at court in a jacket bearing detailed crack-making instructions, complete with diagrams.

Fortunately for the allegedly felonious fashionista, court officials ignored his crack couture.

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An Englishwoman, who shed 84 pounds after getting gastric-bypass surgery was shocked to find out the real reason for her weight loss.

Karren Knight started to exercise after her surgery, and it turned out her stomach band broke soon after the operation, so she did it all on her own.

“I thought surgery was an easy way to lose weight,” she said.

“But . . . all it took was a bit of determination.”

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You can call this new drink Barkweiser.

A pet-friendly pub in the UK is brewing up a new beer especially for dogs. The nonalcoholic beverage — simply called Dog Beer— is flavored to taste like beef.

To go along with the beer, The Branding Villa in Newcastle serves canine guests a roast with what they say is a “cat-flavored” gravy.