These dumb crooks should have just drawn a map to their hideout.

Cops caught diesel thieves in St. Augustine, Fla., who had left behind a trail of leaked fuel drops because the container they had used to carry their load of pilfered petrol had a hole in it.

The trail led authorities from the tank at the fuel depot to the suspect’s home a mile and a half away.

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If you’re heading to Australia anytime soon, look up!

Officials there are warning people that this is the time of year that bunya pine trees start dropping their cones — which are the size of watermelons and weigh 22 pounds.

The cones are so dangerous that authorities in the town of Warragul have roped off a bunya tree for fear someone might be killed.

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A group of elderly women thought nothing of playing cards during an afternoon garden party — until the cops raided their soirée.

The 40 women — ranging in age from their late 70s to 98 — were hauled before a judge in the island nation of Cyprus and charged with illegal gambling because they were caught playing poker.

They each face six months in jail, even though they were playing only penny-ante hands.

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A jilted man is causing outrage in South Africa for placing an ad on a Web site seeking a little person to kick his ex-girlfriend in the shins for dumping him.

Though people called the ad insulting to both women and little people, the man was defiant, telling a Cape Town newspaper: “Midget revenge is the only form of revenge that works these days!”

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Sacre-view!

An embarrassed, furious Frenchman is suing Google for $13,000 after the Web site’s Street View posted a picture of him peeing outside his small-town home, where he’s well known.