A Minnesota high-school senior won’t be able to take either of his dream dates to his prom.

Mike Stone, of Oakdale, lined up two porn stars, who both accepted his invitation.

But one said she thought the teen was kidding, and backed out. Then the school said the other one was not welcome.

The student was disappointed — but he doesn’t give up easily.

He said he’s already making a “Plan B’’ for the big night.

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A high-ranking official of Keller, Texas, decided he wasn’t needed — so he officially laid himself off.

City Manager Dan O’Leary, who made $176,000 a year, said two others do the same work and a third wasn’t needed.

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Here’s another way to get rid of a village leader.

The mayor of the Old West town of Medora, ND, is sticking his neck out — by asking to be hanged.

Doug Ellison wants to erect a gallows and put on a show for tourists: He’d gun somebody down, have a trial and then get the ultimate punishment.

The performance would take only 20 minutes, he said, because “anything longer than that and the tourists would lose interest.’’

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Why would a thief break into jail? To practice his trade.

A thief scaled the fence at a minimum-security prison in Salisbury, NC, dismantled an air conditioner and walked off with its copper parts.

He got away before any “coppers’’ could grab him.

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It’s clear who’s the most important man in Lizzie Griffiths’ life.

The 25-year-old London woman postponed her wedding to Chris Fisher because she needed the money to get chemotherapy for her pet lizard, George.

A sympathetic Fisher said he understands that the lizard will always be “Lizzie’s Number 1.’’