Wtf!

Sidewalks around Philadelphia City Hall are divided into two lanes — one for walkers in a hurry; the other for people strolling along while texting.

The “e-lanes,’’ opened by Mayor Michael Nutter on April Fools’ Day, will be around all week.

Their logo is a drawing of a person peering at a hand- held device.

Nutter said the joke has a serious purpose — to show that the digitally distracted can be a danger to themselves and others.

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Political Pranks II:

Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel celebrated April 1 by submitting a bogus “Freedom of Information Act” request to learn everything about himself.

It mocked his infamous habit of dropping F-bombs as well as his constant talk about job creation.

An aide joked, “Given the scope of the request . . . [it] will create up to 500 jobs.’’

And Emanuel said, “The only four-letter ‘F-word’ I use now is FOIA.”

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Roy Rogers must be turning in his grave.

Cattle rustlers in the formerly Wild West are using Hondas instead of horses.

Cops in Carlsbad, NM, busted three men who stuffed a 220-pound calf into the back seat of their compact Civic.

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Thirty-three is everybody’s lucky number.

A British survey shows people that age are the happiest folks around.

“By that age, innocence has been lost,’’ said psychologist Donna Dawson.

“But our sense of reality is mixed with a strong sense of hope.’’

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They were barking up the wrong tree.

Two cops in England spotted a little dog, not breathing, on the back seat of a parked car.

They broke in to save the puppy — which turned out to be a stuffed toy.

“They must have felt like idiots,’’ said car owner Gordon Williams.