An allegedly acid-crazed Florida college kid pleaded with cops not to cut off his penis, then abruptly changed his mind and begged them to remove his member.

The cops refused, deciding to tase the loon, instead. He still managed to punch one of them in the head.

Predictably, the drug-addled teen claimed he was God.

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This bud’s for you.

A judge in Tacoma, Wash., has ordered police to return a small amount of weed confiscated from a man they pulled over for speeding in May of last year.

In November, the state voted to legalize marijuana, making the amount of pot the guy possessed totally cool with the law.

Cops face contempt charges if they don’t comply with the ruling.

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At least it’s snot bad for you.

A biochemist in Canada says eating your own boogers could help boost your immune system.

By reabsorbing the pathogens the mucous traps, the body can learn how to fight infection, the pioneering scientist told his students at the University of Saskatchewan.

Now he needs volunteers to test his hypothesis.

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Cops in Halifax, Nova Scotia, are on the hunt for swindlers who sold fake gold from the back of a Volkswagen outside pizza joints.

The baubles turned out to be polished brass. The scam artists took about $10,000 from six customers, who complained after they realized they’d been ripped off.

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A greedy grandfather in India got caught after he sold his newborn grandson on Facebook — for just $830.

The fiendish 47-year-old told his daughter that her kid had died. Cops say two temp workers at the hospital helped the no-good grandpa arrange the sale to a businessman in Delhi.

Authorities arrested all three and are questioning the buyer.

The kid is being kept safe by the authorities.