TV’s planned productions and replay rules have lots in common, especially the absence of common sense. Both emphasize the entirely unintended to defeat their primary purpose.

French Open, Saturday on NBC, Andy Murray vs. Juan Martin del Potro. NBC delivered on television’s tacit promise to deliver the best seat in the house.

But it was a barter deal. In exchange, NBC went with a triangle offense, surrounding us with three speakers who spoke to us after every point, and often during points.

This best seat in the house came with a price — one’s patience, nerves and sanity. Two tennis players, three announcers, the latter just wouldn’t leave us alone, not even after the self-evident.

It’s not that I don’t regard Ted Robinson, John McEnroe and Mary Carillo as credible speakers of tennis. Quite the contrary. But after every point? Would they be happy seated next to even one spectator who gave them an earful after every point? Would NBC’s shot-callers want to be seated surrounded by relentless shot-callers?

We tuned in to watch, why make it a talk show?

Of course, NBC doesn’t operate much differently than the rest, but especially ESPN, which would ship a busload of commentators and Telestrators to cover a car wash opening — while laying off hundreds to save money.

As for replay rules, that absurd microscopic, highly debatable second-opinion application that radically altered Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals — the Predators’ 1-0 lead was wiped out when an offside, well before they scored, was ruled — brought a sage reaction from reader Dave Smith of Fair Haven, N.J.:

“How many scoring opportunities have been negated by blown, albeit close, offside whistles that stop play? Obviously, we’ll never know, and that’s a good thing because replay can never be used to ‘correct’ such a situation.”

And so the silliness of it all — what we hear, what we see and what we’re challenged to endure — wins again.

The right-headed may feel alone, but they’re not. They’re just terribly under-represented by media who choose to pander to the wrong-headed rather than risk being condemned as old fashioned — when will Aaron Judge learn to stop using both hands to catch fly balls? — grumpy, cranky or worse.

Throughout Saturday’s Game 3 of the Stanley Cup final in Nashville, the crowd — encouraged by the public address system, which also blared a song about masturbation — chanted its standard crude putdown of opponents, profanity also worn at the game by children of all ages on T-shirts. The coarsening of America, while it has no upside, continues to take us down.

On NBCSN, Doc Emrick didn’t ignore one such chant, but said he was unable to fully repeat it.

There was a perfect opening for a man with the earned respect of hockey fans — the right-headed ones — to add that the Nashville fans should be able to do better, something soft but pointed, such as, “These fans are too good to have such bad habits.”

Emrick can’t possibly approve of such conduct, so why indulge it?

TV people who have achieved the highest fame, and security — a Jim Nantz, an Al Michaels, a Joe Buck — have the forums from which to encourage the bold, smug and wrong-headed to at least think about their public conduct, to consider whether they’re acting as smart folks or wise-guys.

But ignoring it indulges it. That’s not a remedy, it’s a capitulation, surrender to the vandals. The higher-minded must be heard.

Of course, NHL boss Gary Bettman might also insist those in charge of creating arena atmospheres clean up their acts.

But given the NHL’s illogical replay rules and its invitation to have Snoop Dogg perform his vulgar act during last year’s All-Star Weekend, and Roger Goodell’s recent “Good News!” declaration encouraging players to avoid displaying grace and modesty, who knows what Commissioners are paid to do these days.

And what would have been the crime, Sunday, had Game 2 of the NBA Finals began at, say, 6:15 p.m. ET, allowing the entire country to watch the entire game? TV money. That’s always the prohibitive favorite.

FOX’s Pirates-Mets telecast, Saturday, was brutal.

Highlights included play-by-play man Joe Davis claiming that Lucas Duda, playing his 34th game, “is having a career year.”

Analyst A.J. Pierzynski seemed eager to say anything when saying nothing would have been in our and his best interests.

Beyond that, Pierzynski, a former catcher, apparently adheres to the hocus-pocus, by-the-book, by-the-inning pre-fabricated pitching parade.

Of the Mets, he said, “You know, the trickle-down from these starters not being nearly as good as anybody expected is that that bullpen has been taxed, and is struggling mightily, as well.

“When you use your bullpen, every manager has an ideal plan for every game, as far as their bullpen. So when they have to keep going there, you get out of plan. It messes everybody up and gets them off their schedule and routine.”

OK, we get that, have for years, but why? Why bother scripting games before they’re played? We now regularly see 10-12 pitchers per game, creating near four-hour hazes as effective relievers are pulled as a matter of “routine.” Why would managers think the next reliever will be as good? Why not allow that effective reliever continue in order to both win and not tax the bullpen?

Pierzynski caught for losing teams; he watched that “ideal routine” make many messes. Why not explain why managers began and continue to regard relievers as plug-in, fail-safe robots? Why not play to win rather than to follow a fantasy-driven, once-in-a-while script?

Ted Turner, despite his bigoted cracks, colorized movie classics and pro wrestling enterprise that competed with Vince’s and Linda McMahon’s for cable’s top-rated, kid-desensitizing and drug-dead performers’ programming, Tuesday will be presented the New York Yacht Club’s Medal in concert with NBC Sports Group’s screening of “Courageous,” the name of Turner’s America’s Cup-winning boat.

Turner’s medal and the film, Courageous, will be presented June 6 — the anniversary of D-Day. That takes more nerve than courage.

Reader Mark Yost sent an email with a photo from his seat, a good one, too, Friday night, at Dodgers-Brewers.

“So this is what attendance looks like when you don’t charge $1,500 for the best seats. I’m in Row 7, halfway between third and the foul pole. Seat cost: $26. Entire lower deck full.”

Shoot, Yankee Stadium parking costs $35, but that’s down from $45.

(Phil Mushnick’s column returns June 16.)