The Cubs chewed up the Giants on Friday in Wrigley, which enabled Hondo to reduce his accounts payable to 1,880 sisks.

Saturday: Mr. Aitch expects Noah Syndergaard to pitch a thoroughly good game — 20 units on the Metamucils to keep it flowing against the Rays.

Chelsea Clinton is the subject of a feature in the September issue of Vanity Fair. That’s sure to be riveting — a story of how Chelsea, overcoming humble beginnings, pulled herself up by her bootstraps and became a $600,000-a-year on-air trainee at NBC and, subsequently, Vice Chair of the Clinton Foundation. … Vice Chair is an odd title for Chelsea. That seems more like a place her father is required to sit for a period of time whenever he gets caught messing with an intern. … Emailer Mike Nealy points out: Now that the FBI has opened a criminal investigation of Chelsea’s mom, it may not be long before Hondo starts referring to Hillary as “The Portly Orange Pantsuit.”