Hondo treaded water last night as Duchscherer and the A’s made quick work of the M’s to offset the shoddy work at Shea by Lincecum and the Giants to leave the earnings holding steady at 505 pignatanos.

Tonight, he’ll take a 10-unit stab in the dark of Wrigley Field with Cueto and the Reds.

$

Peter “The Perv” Cook has told Christie Brinkley he’d be willing to sacrifice some time with their kids, but only if he gets sole custody of the Web cam . . . Dan Patrick will be joining Keith Olbermann – a/k/a The Gasbag Of All Gasbags – on Football Night in America this season. NBC is praying Dan’s TV work is better than that page-turner he submits to Sports Illustrated every week.

hondo@nypost.com