Breaking news! Hurricane Florence has changed direction and is heading directly for Stitches’ home. But if you’ve been reading this space since April, you knew that already. So, too, does President Trump: “It’s tremendously wet.” … They say to be the best, you’ve got to learn from the best, so Stitches is demanding an apology from all the pitchers who unfairly screwed us this year. How’s that, Serena?

Williams’ BFF, chair umpire Carlos Ramos, has taken so much positive ink in the days following Serena’s tirade that he is now being considered to chair at Bill Cosby’s trial. No coaching from the lawyers’ box.

Our picks a “disaster and embarrassment and leaking like mad,” we head to Fenway. With the Red Sox having already clinched a playoff spot and the Mets looking locked into fourth place, both teams have little incentive. Noah Syndergaard may have something to prove after exiting last week due to a liner off his right side. Pitched a complete game against the Giants in previous start. 10 units on Mets.

Are you sure? Dodgers held on to deck the Cards 9-7. Clayton Kershaw bailed out by, among others, Manny Machado (3-for-4 with a homer). Win, at last, has us at -1,486 lasordas.