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BOSTON – Some say you are born with it. Others argue about whether you can learn it. Still others insist you gradually acquire it.

Whatever, the Nets don’t have it. And “it” is mental toughness.

And that was the topic of a post-game talk the team’s veterans, including Kendall Gill, Johnny Newman and Michael Cage, gave in the locker room following the 97-89 defeat at home to Atlanta Wednesday. If ever there was the stereotype game to provide an argument that the Nets lacked mental toughness, that was it.

They led at 14 at one point, then came down the stretch and crumbled. And it wasn’t the first time it happened. But the veterans are trying to make it, if not the last, one of the last times. So they were hoping – again – to restart their season last night here against the Celtics, the team that sent them into a thus-far irreversible spiral when they literally and figuratively stole a win at the Meadowlands Jan. 15.

“Everybody spoke. Johnny spoke, I spoke, Michael Cage, all of the older guys. And what it was all about was mental toughness,” said Gill, who grew visibly and audibly angry discussing the topic. “Did they listen? I don’t know. I’m not in their head.

“I am upset,” Gill continued. “We’re a better team than our record shows. All these close games we lost, those are just [due to] mental mistakes. We can’t do that any more. You think the fans are getting tired? I’m getting tired of it.”

Everybody’s getting tired of it. Entering last night, the Nets had lost five straight games, four of those in late game fashion, and 8-of-10. Plus, the streak of late losses stretched back. Once again: in the 11 games before last night, the final minute saw a point differential of three-or less. And the Nets have lost seven of those 10 games. Mentally tough? Yeah, right. About as tough as Silly Putty.

One guy, Scott Burrell, played with the master of mental toughness, Michael Jordan. And while Burrell admitted there definitely was room for decided improvement in the area, he stressed that the Nets are far from a complete collection of grizzled vets.

“It’s a young team. It’s all part of the game, growing, learning and becoming a better team,” Burrell said. “We’ve got a point guard [Stephon Marbury], who’s a great player, and Keith [Van Horn], both are like 22, 23 years old.”

Actually, 22 and 24, but who’s counting?

“That’s young,” Burrell continued. “I’m not saying they’re the reason we’re losing, not at all. But it’s a young team. Jamie Feick’s 25. Learning, winning and losing, all that stuff, comes with growing.

“You learn when you win or lose and learn how to play. You’ve just got to learn through mistakes. You can say all you want, talk all you want but you’ve still got to go out there and do it.”

If the Nets have learned in defeat, then they’re bordering on Ph. D. territory, especially if they learn through late-game defeats. They’ve missed shots, thrown balls away, lost balls on the dribble, gotten beat twice by last-second shots. These guys are authorities in heartbreak. But if they were tougher mentally, it would be different.

“When you see a guy come in averaging eight points and he gets 22, you’re not supposed to let that happen,” said Gill, describing the scenario from the Atlanta game when Alan Henderson went off for 22 points. “When you see Dikembe Mutombo posting up, that’s not supposed to happen. Dikembe Mutombo, if he was 6-9, wouldn’t even be in the league. He doesn’t have that high of a skill level. He can block shots because he’s 7-2. When you realize this, you have to go in and don’t let those players beat you.”

Easier said than done.

“As a team we’re building. As far as our mental toughness, it’s staying at one level,” offered Marbury. “I don’t think guys [totally] lack it, we’re just having some lapses. You can’t have that. Our mental toughness shows really well when we’re winning. When we lose, there are a lot of things that get questioned.”

The problem is, at 17-28, there had been far more losing than winning.

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