Eggs and bacon, please — with a side of bribes and kickbacks.

The owners of the Cosmic Diner in Midtown say a longtime waitress, Judith Mejia, reduced customers’ tabs in exchange for cash.

Mejia’s self-serving cost them at least $75,000 over the years, says a lawsuit the owners filed in Manhattan Supreme Court last week.

Mejia “fraudulently and secretly reduced the amount of the check” and then “demanded, received and retained from the customers . . . bribes and kickbacks,” says the suit, which includes four allegedly altered checks.

Mejia, who is still working at the diner at Eighth Avenue and West 52nd Street, denied the allegations.

“How am I going to do something like that?” she asked.

Mejia claims the suit is retaliation for discrimination complaints that she and two other workers have made against their employer.