Wendell Coleman woke up with a splitting headache, so bad he figured he’d better go to the hospital.

Doctors in Jacksonville, Fla., soon found the problem – Coleman, 47, had a bullet lodged in his tongue.

He later told cops a woman stuck a gun barrel in his mouth during a fight the night before and he heard the weapon go off. Then he just went home to sleep.

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Alejandro Martinez will never be considered one of the brilliant criminal minds of our time.

The 23-year-old Las Vegas man filled out a job application at a local pizzeria, then announced a stickup, making off with $200 but leaving behind the application with his real name and address.

“I would chalk it up to either inexperience or plain stupidity,” prosecutor Frank Coumou said.

You’re too kind, Frank. We’re pretty sure it was stupidity.

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A 73-year-old Kenyan grandfather reached into the mouth of an attacking leopard and tore out its tongue to kill it.

Peasant farmer Daniel M’Mburugu said he was tending his crops when the beast charged, letting out a “blood-curdling snarl that made the birds stop chirping.”

“A voice, which must have come from God, whispered to me to drop the machete and thrust my hand in its wide open mouth,” M’Mburugu went on. “I obeyed.”

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Toys ‘R’ Out!

Kindergartners at an Austrian school are having their toys taken away in the belief it will help them fight drug addiction and alcoholism later in life.

“[It] encourages them to think more about how to entertain themselves – they become more social, and even those on the outside of the group find a positive role,” said program head Renate Brauner. Sounds just plain mean to us.

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Women like listening to Mozart, the Beatles or soft rock during sex, while men prefer rappers such as Eminem and 50 Cent, a new survey says.

After making love, most women said they would ideally sip champagne, while guys prefer a cigarette, according to the poll in the German editions of Glamour and GQ.