This is what you call a snow job.

A resourceful security guard came up with a clever way to keep burglars from looting vacation homes in the Vladimir region of Russia – he leaves giant footprints in the snow.

Sergey Sokolov makes the Yeti-size bootprints with enormous wooden soles he made in his workshop.

Since he starting using them, area burglaries have fallen by almost 50 percent.

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It sounded idyllic to Diane and Louis Madonia – a home in rural South Harrison, N.J., with a cattle farm next door. They didn’t expect a pile of cow manure that grows as high as 8 feet and attracts swarms of flies.

Their complaints, to date, have been rejected by New Jersey officials, who ruled that the manure is managed properly.

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Shake, rattle and grow!

Teams of “bosom dancers” are being trained to help Thai women boost their bust size without cosmetic surgery.

The teams – each consisting of one small-breasted and one large breasted instructor – will give lessons at state-run sports centers.

The man behind the plan, Dr. Pennapha Subcharoen, explains that many Thai women who yearn for bigger breasts don’t realize that “regularly taking bosom-firming dance can make their wish come true.”

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A Washington, D.C., man, being questioned for trying to pay for his Wal-Mart purchases with a suspicious check, ate the evidence.

Police said Khalid Naji-Allah snatched his check back from a security guard at the chain’s Stafford, Md., store, then chewed it up and swallowed it.

“We don’t know if it was stolen or altered or what,” said a cop.

And they very likely never will.

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When a Hartford, Conn., sewer-treatment worker called Diane Kurtz to ask if she had lost anything, she was relieved – the car keys she had misplaced earlier in the day must have turned up.

But she was wrong.

The diamond engagement ring that went down her kitchen drain 15 years ago had been found, along with an onyx ring.

Now if someone finds her car keys, she can pick up the rings.