A Brazilian who went to a clinic to have an aching ear checked ended up having a vasectomy after mistakenly believing the doctor had called his name.

A manager at the clinic in the town of Montes Claros said Valdemar Lopes de Moraes, 39, entered the vasectomy room when another man’s name was called.

“He was called by the full name and yet thought it was him. But the strangest thing is that he asked no questions when the doctor started preparations in the area which had so little to do with his ear,” the manager said.

De Moraes, a farmer who has two children, did not want to reverse the operation. (lcf)

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Laziness has landed a former researcher at Michigan State University in jail for 10 months.

Scott Doree, who had confessed to faking the theft of pig bacteria from his East Lansing lab, also was ordered to repay nearly $70,000 in federal grants he received to help develop a vaccine against a deadly pneumonia.

Doree said he staged the theft because after four years of grants, “I hadn’t done the research.”

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Assault charges have been dropped against a Jackson, Mich., topless dancer accused of squirting breast milk in a customer’s face.

A clubgoer claimed the 20-year-old stripper squeezed her breast and squirted him while performing a lap dance.

The city attorney decided he couldn’t “obtain a guilty verdict beyond a reasonable doubt” – after the dancer claimed the man had grabbed her breasts.

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A Southbridge, Mass., mother has been stung by the media frenzy triggered when she advertised for a worthwhile suitor for her daughter – and began interviewing candidates on her front lawn.

Seems Donna Woods, about whom WBT reported on Sunday, isn’t happy about revelations, published in a local paper, about the family’s history of financial and domestic problems.

But the competition for 22-year-old Kelly Devlin’s hand continues. The bride wannabe and her family will be going to Hollywood to introduce two finalists on Sharon Osbourne’s new show.

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A former activities coordinator in the independent studies program at Berkeley HS in Berkeley, Calif. was been charged with coordinating some independent activities of her own – working as a prostitute.

An Oakland police spokeswoman said Shannon Marie Williams, 37, told cops “she was doing this during the summer to supplement her income.” (m, s)

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A British family’s sailing vacation off the east coast of Australia was rudely interrupted when a 30-foot humpback whale crashed into their boat. The 10-ton mammal leaped out of the water and pulled the rigging and mast along with it as it slid down the boat. No one was hurt. (m, s)