Better think twice before bringing Broadway to Bluffton, S.C.

Pols there have banned a production of the award-winning show “The Vagina Monologues” from the Town Hall auditorium because the title is too suggestive.

“I’m thinking more about the children – they would see those posters up everywhere,” said Town Clerk Sandra Lunceford.

Poor Sandra. Wait until she has to deal with one of this year’s Broadway hits: “Puppetry of the Penis.”

Nancy Samuelson walked around the world – without ever leaving Nebraska.

It took her 16 years, 4 months, 25 days and 55 pairs of tennis shoes to walk 24,902 miles – the equivalent of the Earth’s circumference – in daily loops around a trail near her workplace in Lincoln, one lunch hour at a time.

“We did figure it out on a globe,” Samuelson, 42 said.

“I walk about an inch and a quarter a year.”

A tractor-trailer really delivered when it jackknifed in Bloomsburg, Pa., and spilled 32,000 pounds of liver onto a highway.

There were no injuries in the mishap along Route 11, but nearby residents have endured the nauseating stench of raw liver for several days.

A 7-week-old kitty miraculously survived after being sucked into a street sweeper in Australia.

“He must have been trying to avoid the brushes and jumped up into the vacuum as I drove by,” said driver Ernie Jones of Morwell.

“I went to empty it and out rolled the kitten. I just couldn’t believe it. He was pretty dirty, but other than that, he was OK.”

The lucky feline has been nicknamed Hoover.

A dedicated teacher is offering to sell one of his kidneys in a bid to raise money to build three new classrooms in his elementary school.

The 41-year-old educator from Mexico City, who wants $55,000 for his kidney, said, “When I went to take out the newspaper ad, the person stared at me, stunned.”