Corey Cook ignored warnings from his girlfriend not to do anything corny if he proposed to her – but he did anyway, having a farmer carve the words, “Michelle, will you marry me?” into a Napoleon, Ohio, cornfield.

Then he flew his sweetheart over the field and popped the question with a ring.

“She just started giggling like a little girl on Christmas morning” and said yes, Cook said happily.

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Don’t expect any T&A shots in a new Nebraska charity calendar featuring 12 nurses.

That’s because they’re all male nurses.

“You hear, ‘Oh, that’s a girls’ job. But that doesn’t bother me,” said Todd Weldon, who is Mr. January.

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A woman attacked an ATM with a pick ax – while naked.

Cops in Joliet, Ill., say that while the birthday-suited bandit failed to gain entry into the cash machine, she did manage to inflict about $2,000 worth of damage to it.

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As mourners wept at the Toronto funeral of Dane Squires, the “deceased” phoned his daughter Trina to tell her he was OK.

Turns out authorities had identified a body struck by a commuter train as Squires.

“[Trina] totally, totally lost it,” one mourner said.

“She said, ‘There’s a ghost talking to me on the phone. Please somebody try to make sense out of this because I’m losing my mind.’ ”

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A female motorist called mechanics to check a strange sound coming from her car – but probably wished she hadn’t.

The noises turned out to be the sound of her buzzing vibrator.

The battery-powered sex toy had apparently switched itself on in the woman’s suitcase as she was driving through London.

Hmm, sort of gives a new definition to autoeroticism.