Police trying to help an all-shook-up Elvis wound up chasing one of the Blues Brothers.

Crystal, Minn. cops were called to a veterans halls and found a man dressed as Elvis Presley apparently having convulsions. He suddenly jumped up and yelled, “Viva Las Vegas!” before singing show tunes, said Crystal Police Capt. Dave Oyaas.

At about the same time, a man dressed as John Belushi’s character in “The Blues Brothers” allegedly stole a car – so the cops chased and arrested him.

“It’s one of those things that you stop and scratch your head, and you think, ‘Am I seeing what I think I’m seeing?’ ” Oyaas said.

When Scott Duncan and Pamela Habek of San Francisco announced that they plan to sail around the world in a 32-foot cutter, some people said they were nuts.

Understandable, because both Scott, 38, and Pamela, 42, are legally blind.

Duncan, who wears a T-shirt that reads, “Fear Sucks,” says the secret to a successful voyage will be, “first and foremost, radar.”

Scott Limbrecht was arrested for an unusual traffic infraction – driving a lawn mower with a revoked license.

“I couldn’t believe it. Top speed is 5 mph. I just drove a block and a half to a convenience store to get some gas,” said Limbrecht, of Carroll, Iowa.

Police Capt. Mark Heino said the suspect should have stayed off the road, insisting: “That’s a serious misdemeanor.”

Some physicians have a good bedside manner – but Dr. John Razzak’s is too good.

The married British doctor has quit his job – because he says he can’t resist bedding his female patients.

But Razzak, 46, of Guernsey, adds that none of his conquests have complained.

Crime doesn’t pay – except in the Polish city of Lodz, where cops now get a cash bonus for every crook they nab.

And with payments of $60 for ordinary thugs and $200 for those involved in major crimes, arrests have tripled.

“One of my colleagues went straight out and caught three people robbing an old granny,” boasted Officer Gazeta Wyborca.